time flies when u don’t want it to, and stops when u want it to go as fast as the wind. i just notice that i’ve been blogging for abt 10 months and it seems to be flickering out as the days goes by. more like brisk scribbles of wat i do everyday rather than wat my thoughts are or how i feel.

dunno whether it’s the age catching up or i’m just feeling out of sorts. the world seems darker as the days drags on. it seems like i’m slowly losing grip of my rose colored tinted world. everywhere i turn, everyone only has more problems. u would think that as the world evolves, we would all be making better decisions and having lesser problems as we are supposed to be better informed on a global basis. however, all we seem to do is the opposite. the only evolution of mankind are basically the physical material items to help us lead an easier life but on a spiritual, society wise, internally, we seem to be dying despite having more in our lives. our selfishness overwhelms evolution. perhaps we were built like that from the beginning of time and evolution just goes to prove it by the standard we chose to live in today.

all i want is to see the people around me happy cos when they are, i am. i can give up my happiness and wat i want just to see a sincere smile and laughter on another’s face. but no matter wat i do, its never enough. everyone always wants more cos of all the ppl out there, i should be more understanding, tolerant and patient. perhaps i hope too much that the world really is rose colored tinted and that its not as black as it seems. perhaps, just perhaps there is enough good in everyone that if i could just be nicer even though i shouldn’t, things may turn out better and there really is more good in this world. perhaps, just perhaps ppl can see my rose colored tinted world the way i hope it will be.

i have tried going out there to get the things that makes me happy. i have also tried waiting for fate to come by so that i may grab it. but it just doesn’t seem to go in any direction and i am back at square one. waiting. always waiting for everyone else to make a decision so i may make my own choice. perhaps i have to start making my own choices and be firm with it then let others deal with it. but then again, i guess the possibilities are endless which is why humans will never be satisfied with what they have and that is precisely wat drives us to more problems then solutions. being nice is also a flaw in its own. basically, it doesn’t matter whether ur nice or not, someone will still be hurt, problems will still persists, humans will still be humans.

i still want to be nice even though it seems i shouldn’t be based on the way my brain is heading towards lately cos i still hope that perhaps one day, even if its not during my time (but hopefully my time – i am still selfish to a point – i’m only human), someone will be happy. just have to get use to the idea and drum it into my brain that maybe that happy person may not be me.

seriously, i have no idea wat i’m saying… my thoughts are flying everywhere and hitting everything at the moment…

anyways, i’m still going to be updating my daily brisk scribbles as usual though… after all, i’m still me…

31 mar 2005 – thurs
had a farewell lunch, pizza hut at 1 utama for a colleague’s last day. sigh…off she goes to greener pastures and me having to do her work… :o(

went for dinner somewhere at kelana jaya area after accompanying a friend to buy glasses. pork ribs were yummy that i tapau home :oP

1 apr 2005 – fri
APRIL FOOLS DAY! no one tried to fool me tho, except hitz.fm morning crew!!

had kfc for dinner. the curry chicken thingy… not a good choice of taste.

2 apr 2005 – sat
tried this dimsum place at uptown for lunch. some dishes were not bad.

later met up with my ex colleagues for a short meetup and collecting saman wedding card :oP before rushing for my medical check up and downtown to exchange a computer cable. managed to get a decent handsfree kit at last!

3 apr 2005 – sun
dad woke me up at abt 530am to go to lukut for ching ming… yawn… as usual, relatives were late so we started abt 7am. luckily we had abt 5 graves so we finished abt 10 plus then went for bak kut teh nearby (yuuummm). thought i could go home and rest but they all wanted to buy fresh vege from the farm then my mom wanted to visit her sister staying nearby as well as going to the temple in seremban for prayers… i was totally exhausted!! only got back abt 2pm, showered and slept till its time for dinner. wanted to watch a movie at 1 utama but seats were bad so ate at the jetty at 1 utama (food’s so so).

4 apr 2005 – mon
lunch at usual spot with one of my favourite boys. haven’t seen him in a while. last time i heard from him, he was watching a movie during working hours! lucky fella!!

tried zing restaurant at uptown for dinner. food’s so so then had mamak session with another favourite boy so that i could help him send his tax return.

was totally exhilarated cos my new dell 17” ultrasharp flat lcd monitor arrived!! :o) hooray!!!!

5 apr 2005 – tues
met up my friend who came up from spore for lunch at pizza uno. the food is not as good as last time :o(

6 apr 2005 – wed
boring day… work work work…my bro and his gf was suppose to arrive from spore at abt midnite but their bus was delayed for 2 hours!! traffic was bad…

7 apr 2005 – thurs
another quiet day…finally picked up my car from servicing :oP

8 apr 2005 – fri
accompanied a friend to 1 utama to pick up items at laura ashley after work. at the same time, i bought biscuits at m+s :oP later went to bakerzin to tapau yummy cake!! slurp!

9 apr 2005 – sat
watched cartoon and slept the whole day… need to recharge batteries… tired… sick…

10 apr 2005 – sun
had dimsum lunch in kl before my bro’s fiancé went back to spore then caught ms congeniality 2 at times square and hang around low yat, piccolo galleria to look at shoes and drinks at starbucks before heading home.

-The opposite of a correct statement is a false statement. But the opposite of a profound truth may well be another profound truth. (Niels Bohr, 1885 - 1962)-